Family Matters. No not the show from the 90’s with that obnoxious character anyone in my generation can quote. That simple statement means so many different things. When it comes down to it, you only have one family and they matter.

We all know when we’re growing up we can’t wait to get out on our own and experience the world. We want nothing more than to move out on our eighteenth birthday and be adults. I know I did. I wanted to be grown and experience things for myself. In fact when I was twenty not only did I move out, I moved away. Not just away but the furthest point in the continental United States away from my family. I switched coasts and moved from Massachusetts to Seattle. I drove my twenty year old self across the country (alone) to move with my boyfriend. I got a job, struggled and was alone. He was in the military and away at sea for nine of the twelve months I lived there.

What did I learn? I missed my family. People I loved were getting married, having babies and getting on with their lives. I was missing it. Yes I was having an adventure that I wouldn’t change for anything but I was alone. Do you think I learned from this? Heck no. I was twenty remember. I followed that guy to Key West where I spent three more years away from my family. Experiencing some of the most difficult emotional times I’ve ever had with no family support. Yes, I made friends in Florida so I wasn’t physically alone. But it’s not the same as your family. People that love you unconditionally despite your stupid mistakes.

When I finally left that guy (relationship story for another time) but I wasn’t ready to come home. I still thought I could do it on my own. So I moved to Arizona. Alone. Again. I’m not going to say that this wasn’t a good plan. I met my husband there and we have a family now. However, I was alone again. While I would kill for alone time now, there is something about being thousands of miles away from the people that love and really know you that will put all your personal relationships into perspective.

My grandmother had a stroke and I wasn’t there. I wasn’t there for the birth of both my nephews. I wasn’t there when my youngest brother was a teenager and needed me. I wasn’t doing that to my kids. I wanted them to see the value of family and friends. So I moved again (this time dragging my would be husband away from the place he had called home for ten years.) We came back to the state I had called home for the first two decades of my life. Determined to show my kids that family matters.

So, petty disputes aside, your family is the only one you have. It could be any size and shape but it’s yours. They matter. Life is too short to miss out on the important stuff. Love them in all their crazy glory. I can tell you, you’d miss them if they weren’t around.